The Reality
by ShootinSta
Summary: I was in a peculiar mood when I wrote this. Strange things are inspiring me to write. Another continuation from #54. But the truth is, Rachel isn't /really/ dead. She's alive, and with Tom, who's not dead either. I might elaborate on it later on.


My name is Rachel. And I was on the Blade Ship. My little plan was working out perfectly, more than perfect actually. I watched Tom at the controls and watched his goons working at consoles surrounding him. Visser One had trusted Tom, and now he was on the Blade Ship. Jake had trusted me, and now I was on the Blade Ship as well. He wanted me to attack, and kill his own brother, and stop the Blade Ship from doing anything at all. Because, you see, he _trusted me_. 

But frankly, I was sick of fighting as an Animorph. I'd rather fight a completely different battle. And that's why I was morphing into a polar bear. It was all in place. Splendidly in place. In a few moment, a poor pitiful soul in a grizzly bear morph would attack Tom and the rest of the bridge crew. And the people on the Pool Ship would think it was me. I would've laughed aloud if I wasn't a bear.

And then the grizzly charged from it's spot. It wasn't me, oh certainly not. It was some homeless woman Tom had picked up on the street. It had taken a good amount of bribes to get her to do this; and now she thought she was thinking she was just doing a grand stunt in some big Hollywood film. Ha. So simpleminded, like the people she'd fought with for _three years_. Three years of my life had been wasted on this simple fight. They should've figured out by now I hated it.

I bounded forward, polar bear morph fully in place. I fought the grizzly bear, acting as if I wanted to save Tom's life. Though by now, Tom's snake morph had been safely whisked away. I could've snorted. The viewscreen was on, with people watching the chaos. And actually thinking I was fighting, and Tom's life was soon going to end. Laughable fools! 

By now the grizzly had Tom's double, a _real_ snake clenched in her teeth, doing exactly as she was instructed beforehand. It was only a movie, after all. No one really would die. That was when the hologram flicked up. No one on the other side of it would know the difference. I sat back in my morph to watch the scene.

The grizzly bear, me, had demorphed and spat out the body of 'Tom'. I could see all my former comrades watching the display with looks of pure horror and worry. The polar bear I had been playing slammed its claws into Rachel's, my, head. But of course, not before she said "I love you, Tobias." 

That had been my own little idea. Maybe I did love Tobias, and that's why I put that little statement in there. Maybe I truly, truly the loved him, and wanted to say I was sorry. But I couldn't bear that thought at the moment. I _just_ wanted to jerk the heartstrings of the Animorphs watching. It would jerk the heartstrings of people who ever read about me in history books, too. The valiant Rachel, her final words the caring, compelling last words of, "I love you, Tobias." That's all it was, simple as that.

But no one would ever know that. Not aside from the crew aboard this ship. And none of this would even have happened if the Ellimist hadn't realized her skeptical attitude nowadays. "Did I make a difference?" I asked. As soon as I could learn my answer, the idea hit me. Maybe it was the Ellimist that planted the idea in my brain, but I knew what I had to do to stop fighting this pointless war. I'd fought doubly hard to try and end it. Just to make the Yeerks back down. Risked life and limb. But still three years went into the fight. 

But no more. I'd live my own life now! In space, with my _rescuers_. I had made sure Yeerks would never infest me, as I had made sure that no extras were brought aboard with them. And, Tom had sworn to me he wouldn't do such a thing. It would be life in its greatest aspect. Peace at last. But first a final fluke. 

The homeless woman had demorphed, and remorphed into Rachel, myself. That's when I attacked. Half the bridge crew including myself was fighting her, and Tom had been handed over to bite her, plain and simple. As soon as we backed off, she was dead. The movie role of a lifetime, and one helluva death scene. We'd jettison the body out into space and they'd all think the fatality was me, if the body was even found. If help never came, she'd be floating out there until she bumped into a space station. I couldn't care less if the body was never found, though. It would add more mystery to what had truly happened to me. 

It wasn't like they'd figure out where _I_ was. 

"Rachel, you reprogrammed Erek, right? If you didn't, that ship's going to fire on us any time now." Tom said while he was sitting down, fully demorphed. 

"Did it. Not a problem, to do it, either. We're as good as gone," I grinned. A futile attempt to stop us with the Pool Ship was all that we met as we sped off into space. It had been a synch for me to find the Pemalite Crystal and reprogram Erek just a tiny bit so he would get it in his head to drain the weapons on the Pool Ship. Then, of course, I had thrown it back out into the ocean. Maybe this time someone wouldn't get lucky with a metal detector. 

"In that case, Rachel, welcome to the crew," Tom smirked as she sat down in the seat beside him. "Now we just have to figure out where we'll be off to."

I nodded, admiring Tom. He was so much like Jake, not only in looks, but also in his personality. A leader, caring just enough towards his colleagues, intelligent. Too bad it was only the Yeerk talking, but they were really the ones in control, weren't they? 

*********

I was on some space station, who it belonged to, I had no clue. I was there with the rest of the Blade Ship's crew, scouring each level for more supplies. It seemed to be all they ever did nowadays, raid for supplies, scare aliens out of almost all of their cargo and blast their way into space stations and onto planets. Almost as monotonous as what she had been doing with the Animorphs. 

But I was so glad when I found Andalites on the ship. Not just _Andalites_, but _Ax_. Since he was in a death trap anyway, I may as well have the right to toy with him. I slowly morphed into the polar bear that had supposedly killed me a few years back, watching in the shadows as I watched him and his crew.

So, now he was a Prince? That would be even more interesting. I watched them examine a hair I had so carelessly left behind in my haste to hide. A single hair. Who would care about_ that_? I inched out of hiding. 

Hey, Ax? Remember me? He paused, stalk eyes swiveling around before they landed on me. The 'brow over his main eyes raised.

I do believe you're Rachel, which is not true, because she'd dead. 

You're so smart. But I'm dead. I'm here. I called out to the rest of the crew that was lying in wait, Get the rest of the Andalites. I get the leader.

Animals and aliens of every sort shot from every available hiding place on the deck. The Andalites were dead in a matter of seconds; few even had time to whip their tailblade at their attackers. 

Rachel, why aren't you dead? Ax, or should I say _Prince_ Aximili, asked. I could've laughed my head off then. 

I'm just not, plain and simple. Any more questions? 

Why are you doing this, and why did you disappear? Tobias has been very distraught over your death.

He mentioned the 'person'. I'd buried Tobias in my thoughts, trying to forget every fact about him. I hissed mentally, turning around. I told them to do what they wanted with the Andalite, before demorphing and disappearing back into the Blade Ship. I'd have to forget Tobias all over again, and it was a good time to start. 

*********

"A vessel's on sensors!" 

Tom and I both raised our eyebrows. "Kelbrid?" I asked. The Kelbrids would have demolished any other vessel in their territory, it had to be the only choice.

"No, ma'am. Yeerk. A prototype ship that was left behind in Earth's orbit." 

Tom cursed. I cursed. We knew exactly who was on that ship. The people I had made believe I was dead. Someone had tipped them off to where we were! Everything was going to go crumbling into pieces after this. 

When they contacted us, I made sure to remain in a darkened corner so they wouldn't see me, as did Tom; the two of us was certainly rouse suspicion. I glanced at the screen. There was Jake, Marco, two people she didn't know. And Tobias. Why had he come? Why did they let him go with them on that stupid mission? He was a bird! I ignored the conversation for the most part, fuming over the fact that they had allowed, maybe _asking_ Tobias to come along, then watched thecrew put up the elaborate hologram of their 'leader'. 

It was really just a little collage, put together to freak out the passive passerby they wanted to grab supplies from. "Obey The One or be killed!" Most people liked giving up their cargo instead of being blasted. The faces weren't really important, or absorbed for that matter, just random of people the crew had killed over the last couple of years. It was a nice idea, really. But sadly enough, the former Animorphs (on the _Rachel_, might I add) weren't backing down as easily. 

And within a short while after being for the most part disabled, they were going to ram the ship. And of course, the crew wouldn't allow that. Back-up reserves for the weapons were on, and they were going to fire. 

"No!" I screamed, shooting out from my hiding spot, "Don't. Kill. Them!" 

And sadly enough, the viewscreen was still on. Quite on.

Rachel? I winced. Tobias. I glanced skeptically at the screen, listening to shouts that the _Rachel_ had come to complete stop. She'd just made a fool out of herself to save him.

"…Yeah?"

Aren't you dead?

"…Not really." Damn. I'd have a lot of explaining to do. A whole lot of explaining to do. 

Jake and Marco looked rather stupefied at the fact I was alive, and living with the Blade Ship's crew. 

"Rachel, I knew you were nuts, but going over to the Yeerks?" Marco raised his eyebrow. Jake must've been at a loss for what to say.

"I'm not a Controller," I mumbled, glaring at the ground. They probably wouldn't believe me. They'd think the Yeerk in my head was lying, of course. It was the only logical explanation for my being on the Blade Ship. Considering they'd probably thought they'd found my floating around in space, there probably wasn't a good answer to be found. 

We have to do something. Get her off and help her.

"Tobias! I'm not a Controller," He didn't even trust me! I was so distracted at the scene before me, I didn't even notice that Tom was starting to shout out orders until the last minute. My eyes widened, I was just now noticing words like 'All power.' And 'Prepare to fire'.

I charged towards one of the consoles, ramming the person manning the station out of the way with all the force I could muster. I had to find that button! My eyes searched the console frantically, before I rammed my hand on the proper button.

The 'self destruct' button.

All the power in the Blade Ship shut off. All that was left was the glow of the emergency lights and the viewscreen. All eyes were on me, those on the bridge, and those on the _Rachel_. Nothing moved, and no one spoke before the computer chimed into the silence.

"Thirty seconds until self-destruct."

The bridge crew shot into action, desperately trying to shut off the self-destruct sequence. It wasn't working, they couldn't shut it off no matter what they did to prevent the annihilation of the ship. 

I stepped out in front of the viewscreen, staring at the faces. It was just like the hologram I'd created. Tobias was standing in front of me, tears shining in his eyes. I was in the hologram, and it was horrible. It was the worst thing I had ever come up with.

"Get the ship away, Tobias. I don't want you dead," I whispered, my eyes fluttering shut momentarily. 

"Ten seconds until self-destruct."

Tobias shook his head, "No. I won't lose you."

"Tobias. Go. I love you too much to let you die."

5.

"Marco? Get it working," Tobias smiled weakly, a tear going down his cheek, "I love you too, Rachel."

I blinked back tears. This was far too upsetting to me. Far, far too upsetting.

3. 

2.

"Bye Tobias," I whimpered, closing my eyes. Now I'd end, I knew it.

1.

((….And if I get good feedback, I'll add…Another chapter. Ohmygawd!))


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